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Title:Provogue :Look at this comfort zone of life

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This online MLM training tip is on how to grow a successful MLM home business. The key is tofind a lot of the right kind of people and then take the time to train them to be able
to do the same thing when they join the business

The right kind of people is what's really
important. Don't focus on looking for people with need. It's about finding people with strong desire. The majority of people
will tell you they need more money. Not all of them have the desire and drive to do something about
it!

It starts with an online mlm training and sponsoring system that builds a relationship with motivated prospects.
It brands me as a leader and the one who can help them succeed. The system has the prospect contacting
me for information on joining my business when the timing is right. This works far better than pitching friends and
neighbors or spending every evening calling phone leads. When a prospect telephones me, that's a good indication of strong desire./>
stop procrastinating How commited are you to changing your life
What would you be willing todo to make it happen
Are you willing to master some simple skills and follow a proven system

Would you be willing to go beyond your comfort zone
Would you be willing to devote 7 to 10
hours per week to your business
Are you ready to do it consistently for 1 to 3 years

Will you promise to work at it even when you didn't feel like it.

Take your networking business
to a new level. Quit wasting your time on people with need. Start attracting prospects with strong desire. Plug them
into a good source of online mlm training.

Joe Barclay is an expert at training others to quickly, easily
create success online. Read this and other somekeyword articles at his website. comfortzonebook Learn to master attraction marketing and
be a top producer in your business by subscribing to Joe's free somekeyword.

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Mention personal branding to someone who lives on the quiet side of life, and their first associations may be of
flash, pretense and puffery comfortzone. Thats not how I look at it. Branding offers a powerful opportunity to help
people understand your strengths and talents, to hear your distinctive story and to grasp your values and preferences so they
can come forward or go away according to how well you and they match.

You put a lot of
candor together with a little drama and pizzazz, and you get the reward of working with clients who appreciate you,
respect the way you work, admire your credentials and experience, pay when and what you ask for, and stick with
you for years. Less stress, more satisfaction. Better matchups with clients, a more profitable professional practice.

Lets say,for example, that youre a financial advisor for business owners. goal setting You help them figure out their best
exit strategies how they can readily sell their business when the time comes, pass it along smoothly to the next
generation or simply shut it down and retire. Over the years youve realized that you offer an unusual combination of
realistic, big-picture thinking about finances and emotional savvy in helping clients identify their wants, wishes and concerns.

When clients
expect just the numbers from you, they dont like the questions you ask. Or you get upset because you see
that their understanding of their options is clouded by emotional hang-ups theyre not willing to discuss. On the other hand,
the work also has a tendency to go off the rails when clients approach the issues purely emotionally, as if
you were a therapist.

Your solution: adopting the slogan, Hard numbers with compassion. You use this phrase prominentlyon your web site, on your business cards, when you network or introduce yourself at parties, even framed on your
office wall where you meet with clients. This attracts those who want exactly what you want to give them. It
also alerts people and reminds them of what to expect from you.

Adopting a slogan is only onemethod of branding. Your ideal-client-attracting identity can also come out in your company name, the photos you select to portray
you and illustrate your offerings, the tone of your writing (brash and irreverent or warm and friendly, for example), a
carefully slanted bio, characteristic behaviors, an is this you portrait of who you work with, a how we work page,
and a good many other options.

Approached this way, branding spotlights your key values, unique gifts and idiosyncraticmasteries, conveys what customers can expect from you and portrays your personality strengths in a positive light. You use verbal
and visual techniques to dramatize those ideas, yet theres essential honesty and consistency underlying this clear, sparkling business image. Best
of all, the wrong people those youd inevitably disappoint or run into conflicts with dont like your branding and go
away. The right people respond.

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Your trainer will generate a particular training program tailored to your particular wants. Functioning on your own it iseasy to fall into a monotonous regime. A private trainer can blend it up and maintain it exciting.

Speed-You
will get the outcomes you have to have in a matter of weeks with a personal trainer. East London is
the home of some of the best trainers in the sector. If you want to see success rapid a trainer
is capable of functioning you to the very best of your skill for maximum results.

Effects-A trainer will get
you final results. Viewing the benefits of all of your tough do the job is highly satisfying. An instructor will
assistance you push the boundaries, placing you out of your comfort zone to attain the effects you desire.

Picking
out a personalized trainer London can be a daunting task. The purpose is that there are countless numbers of professionals
in the United kingdom offering qualified providers. Choosing the most acceptable from this magnitude requires some research. The search can
only be simple if the consumer understands what they are looking for comfortzone. Purchasers must recognize that just about
every professional makes use of a distinctive angle when teaching.


Whilst various, they nonetheless produce the expected instruction
providers. The big difference is that most clients research for specialists who can present companies tailored to fit their demands.
They are generally interested in the professional's character and not just their qualifications. It is crucial to them because they
look for to develop extended lasting and favorable functioning connection. Constructing a bond is important to produce a favorable coaching
romance.

For a single to uncover a great qualified, they will need to search in the right destinations. Checking
for details in the appropriate sites means locating the suitable individual. Having said that, for one particular to realize this,
they should fully grasp their requires. Recognizing what one is shopping for can assist an individual in identifying the most
suitable individual. Some individuals choose to train in the early morning or in the night, while others like to train
at lunchtime.

procrastinating It is also essential to recognize wherever one feels much more secure to train. Most
persons choose private experts to assistance them train from their households, though people do it in the workplace. Number of
people today want to train in several spots. Clientele will need to pick out an spot that gives them favorable
training grounds. Clientele ought to choose industry experts who are adaptable enough to suit in the client's system.

/>A specialized and skilled human being will need to be mindful of all the teaching grounds in London. In fact,
the expert really should offer tips of the best work out parts to the clients. The specialized must also have
an understanding of the requirements of the client to offer you the finest work out system.London has quite a few
services in various locations. Subsequently, the specialist really should advise the greatest services to use in instruction.

There are
some clientele who favor to mix the schooling and their studies. A superior skilled is the one particular who is
connected to a great health club. The professional will need to work out a system that ought to suit nicely
into the client's program. Individual Schooling - Do not Waste Your Income, Obtain the Very best!, How To Happily Get
In shape And Shapely With A Personalized Trainer

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Phone fear is based, usually, on the fear of rejection, and fear of rejection is pretty darn typicalin any type of sales position. I mean, seriously, who wants to get yelled at, hung up on, or even
politely told, "No thanks." Not me, not you, not anyone. All of my students and most of my clients and
audiences suffer some kind of phone phobia. People are afraid of looking silly, messing up, getting rejected or forgetting what
they wanted to say. In fact, when I have students of clients role-play with me, they frequently forget what they
had planned on saying. They just go blank. Ever happen to you

Now before you pull out the
old, "use a script" defense, let me tell you something. Scared is scared, period. If you think someone reading a
script sounds less afraid or sounds more confident, call me about some ocean front property I'm trying to unload here
in Sacramento! Truth is, scripts can and do support and enhance a telephone or in-person "presentation" so long as-and this
is the big thing-the agent is confident to begin with. And even then, I encourage my clients to massage scripts
to suit their own personality, linguistic style, vocabulary, etc. Otherwise, the script is straight off the shelf canned, and if
you got it from a trainer, that means so did a thousand other agents.


And thisisn't just about cold-calling either. A mega business coach confided in me last week that he, himself, gave a real
estate agent 9 hot leads and that agent did not call one of them. Not one. And this isn't an
isolated case. It's amazing how many agents fail to return calls from prospects, calls regarding their listings, and Internet leads.
Leads they pay to receive, they refuse to call back. Phone fear. It's no wonder that when the typical FSBO
finally lists, it's with the agent who called him, on average, 5 times. Those agents that do call, usually only
call once or twice (if at all), so the constant caller gets the gold.

The real secret to
overcoming phone fear is forthcoming, but first, let's lay some groundwork. It is perfectly normal human nature to want people
to like you and to not reject you, so there is nothing inherently wrong with getting the general butterflies in
the tummy feeling when you pick up the telephone. Top Producers pick up the phone, but that doesn't mean they
don't get nervous.


I've been fascinated with phone fear for sometime now and researched itpretty thoroughly. The interesting thing is that when I interview top producers and brokers---and yes, brokers have phone fear too
(how do you think they recruit agents), I find that everyone of them admits to 1) feeling a bit nervous;
and, 2) incorporating the tactics I will share with you. Whether they were born confident, which I doubt, or developed
it through personal and professional development and training, the results are the same: they pick up the phone, they get
the deals. It doesn't get much simpler than that.

Because of my own training in psychotherapy, hypnosis, I
am huge proponent and student of the subconscious mind. The subconscious mind houses all of our fears and past programming.
For instance, most of the time when you react to someone and then later on wonder what in the heck
you got so mad about, it was a trigger from a past experience that set you off, even if you
have no clue what it was. All that said, I've found the strategies I teach for top producing success are
perfectly suited for phone fear-again, reiterating the idea that if you worked through phone fear, much of your business would
improve (of course you must market and communicate well also). So going around the conscious mind via hypnosis can be
quite effective in quelling your fears. We are currently producing a hypnotic CD on phone fear, but you can find
others CDs or hire a professional hypnotist (gets pricey) to get the ball rolling.

Visualizing, seeing yourself successfully making
the calls, is another key component. And just don't visualize yourself on the phone; see and feel yourself smiling, setting
the appointment, and thrilled beyond description about how easy it is to initiate contact. See and feel the person at
the other end just as pleased as punch that you called him comfortzone. Make it as real as you
can manage. Creative visualization really is key to getting your subconscious mind open to the idea that picking up that
telephone could be a good thing.

Feel the fear and use it. So many of us hide from
fear like it's an enemy. It's not. It's your ego's way of telling you that you're doing something new and
uncomfortable and so it feels threatened and wants you to run for cover. When we step outside of our comfort
zone, fear is a natural occurrence. Unless you're being chased by a big bear, chances are you will survive a
phone call. Virtually all the top producers I have interrogated about phone fear have confided that they feel it too,
but unlike the rest of us, they USE it. They transmute it into enthusiasm and energy. And guess what That
passion comes shining through at the other end of the phone. Don't you love to talk to people who seem
to be bursting with enthusiasm

These are the three most effective means I know of to deal with
the subconscious mind concerning phone fear. You can also add positive affirmations, too. For instance, writing , "I LOVE calling
prospective clients," "Talking on the phone is a fun and profitable," etc. Affirmations, when repeated, posted on your computer screen,
or written down daily can really add to your effectiveness.

If you'd like to receive an email when
our "Phone Fear" segment, covering both conscious and subconscious approaches, is on our Internet radio show, we'll have live discussion
and call-in questions, drop me an email at

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Are you finding it to be tough to get started in a new venture Are you working out enoughor have you put it off completely

As weve discussed in prior engagements, the mind only truly reacts to
either intense pleasure or intense pain. comfortzone Feeling one of these two emotions will get you to make a
change in your life instantly.

We see it in many instances but the most prevalent, I think, revolve
around relationships and personal growth. How many people do you know that are in stale relationships but won't move on
because of the comfort level How many have talked about new business ventures or making more money only to stave
off because of the comfortable life they have at the moment.

Remember, growth only occurs when our mental
boundaries expand. If something you haven't done makes you a little uncomfortable (not scares the heck out of you), just
think about the positive impact on life the new thing brings to you. Try to push yourself each day. Try
to conquer, yes conquer, something new everyday.

Lets suppose that being a loser is high on your totem
pole of worst possible things. If you want to lose weight, just say to yourself when you need an extra
push, Only LOSERS are overweight. I am not a loser; therefore, Ill go to the gym today.

Of
course, this represents a generic example. Other examples could be instances where youve seen something very disturbing (like a ruined
heart on TV). You can then use that to influence you. You obviously dont want your heart to look like
that, do you

Suppose you were in the best shape of your life in college and there was
one particular spring break trip that you remember vividly. Lets just say you had a great time. If you are
looking to get back into that type of shape, just continually reflect on that particular time of your life whenever
your motivation subsides.

The "Comfort Zone" may be the worst place to be. Some may argue, in the
case of personal growth, that rock bottom may be a better place. The pain that a person can feel when
they are this low will push many people to go places theyve never dreamed, simply because now they feel like
they have nothing to lose.

In order to break out of your Comfort Zone and see some meaningful changes,
employ the pleasure-pain technique. If the pleasure or pain you associate with the situation is great enough the results are
only a thought away comfortzone.

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I've often witnessed the ways in which many people become their greatest obstacle in their path towards success. It'shuman nature to do this. We complain at the drop of a hat when we don't achieve the outcomes we
desire. Whether we're seeking a new career path, a fulfilling romantic relationship, better relationships with our colleagues at work, managing
our finances more effectively or increasing our income, we think it's just about manifesting the end result. But really what's
required is for us to grow at a personal level. We're being called to change our old habits and ways
of being in the world. Many of us can easily share a list of things that we'd like to do
or achieve. Yet, too often, that list stays inside our heads. Why Because, in order to create external change, the
first essential step is to be willing to shift internally. We talk a good talk, but when it comes to
creating results we hit a roadblock, feeling stuck and challenged by shifting our thoughts and beliefs. We are too quick
to surrender our dreams and we throw our hands up in the air, giving up.

1. Admitting that we
enjoy complaining, feeling hopeless and overwhelmed. Sounds crazy, doesn't it But admit it, don't you experience a slight sense of
satisfaction when you complain about your particular situation or circumstances Part of us finds pleasure in wallowing in our own
self-pity. We actually enjoy receiving supportive comments and an empathetic head shake from others. We tell ourselves that we can't
change or that we're inherently flawed in a particular area. This causes us to feel a sense of relief because
we let ourselves "off the hook", feeling justified in not taking any further action. Often we convince ourselves that we
really didn't want what we were seeking anyway.

2. Accepting responsibility. We have to stop complaining and blaming others
(regardless of whether or not we believe we are in the right and they are in the wrong). We must
remember that we are the common denominator in every situation that we've encountered in our lives. We can continue to
blame others and give away our power or we can step up to the plate and accept our part in
the way situations have played out in our lives.

procrastinating 3. Defining our personal growth edge. Get clear
about what is holding you back. Ask yourself, "How am I being called to grow in this situation What is
the opportunity that I'm being given to learn right now What are my underlying beliefs behind how I interact with
others that is causing me to behave in a certain way with them" And here's the biggie: "Do I really
believe that it's possible for me to change or am I rigidly committed to the belief that I can't change
and that my situation will always remain the same".

You cannot create change with this kind of belief. If
you don't believe change is possible, then don't get frustrated with yourself when you don't feel motivated to create the
change you desire stop procrastinating. You're sending mixed messages to the universe. It's equivalent to having your foot on
the gas and the brakes at the same time.

4. Getting clear about what we want. Many of us
experience conflicting values and priorities in our lives. We want to have a successful career and we want to be
there for our family. We believe it's impossible to have both. But it is possible to have both. This is
your soul talking to you - calling you. You can have both; don't disregard one or the other. If you
want a successful career and you also have a desire for rich, connecting relationships with your family - claim it!
When we get in touch with what we really want and truly desire at a soul level, we re-motivate ourselves./>
I have found this to be true for myself. At times in my life when I struggled and felt
unmotivated, I would stop myself and get back in touch with finding clarity in the result that I wanted to
achieve. If you're not clear about the "what you want" part, focus on specific qualities that you'd like to achieve.
For example, if you're not clear about the specific kind of career you want, focus on the qualities of the
career. You may decide that you want a career that you are passionate about and that brings a specific amount
of income.

5. Being willing to step out of our comfort zone. Once we've identified the beliefs and behaviors
that are holding us back, we need to be willing to take action and step out of our comfort zone.
I heard a quote sometime ago, "Success lies just beyond my comfort zone."

The clients I've worked with who
have achieved the results they desire are the ones who are willing to take a good hard look at what
is holding them back, to get clear about what they are passionate about and what they want to go for,
and are willing to take action to move in that direction.

Each day we are provided with the opportunity
to bridge the gap between growing inwardly to create the external reality we desire. When we focus on the inner
part, the outer part truly does take care of itself comfortzone.

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A capability to illustrate the similarities and variations between coaching and different individuals development techniques is helpful when itcomes to putting in place coaching in your team and your organization. You'll notice that if your folks are unclear
regarding what coaching involves and have confused it with say mentoring or counselling, then they may not have interaction as
absolutely as you'd like.

comfortzonebook Coaching is. . . Coaching is concerning serving to folks move out of
their comfort zones. By definition, we are operating in our comfort zone when we are performing tasks and activities we
have a tendency to notice relatively simple and straightforward. Several would argue that there is completely nothing wrong with folks
operating in their comfort zone provided the job gets done which not everyone is hell bent on climbing the greasy
pole chasing promotion after promotion. This is often true, however it's less true than it once was. In these turbulent
times the nature of the work that people do will amendment even if they don't and we are obliged to
help our teams constantly renew their skills and knowledge. All too usually we tend to handle this badly and move
folks too quickly from comfort zone to panic zone while not recognizing the learning zone in between.

Coaching
is concerning releasing potential. As coaches we build the belief that people come equipped and hard-wired with all they have
to succeed. The coaching principles and techniques we have a tendency to'll explore exhaustive anon are concerning removing the barriers
to that potential coming back through. Therefore coaching can be thought of as a lot of involved with drawing out
than putting in.

Most conventional coaching and development concentrates on teaching people things; the talents and information they
have to perform. Coaching follows on from this and concentrates on giving people the means to develop their information and
skills; to possess access to them even when under pressure and to use them in a diverse range of situations.
Coaching then is a lot of targeted on helping others to learn as this is a a lot of additional
enduring outcome and one that creates independence.

Where it's done well, coaching can be motivational and enjoyable for coach
and coachee alike. The coach can get their kicks from observing their individuals blossom and noticing the delight folks feel
as they grow, develop, solve and innovate within a training relationship. In a work situation, coaching has to be performance
focused. There are targets to be reached, sales to be made, prices to be contained, clients to serve, changes to
be made, policies to implement and therefore on. It's solely as a result of coaching has proven such a good
contributor to these ends that it's endured and not fallen away in the style of thus many fads stop
procrastinating. However coaching is also people centred; Ultimately, it's individuals who perform (or don't) and we have a tendency to
must settle for that people come back with feelings, hopes and fears, emotions, etc. which any approach to addressing people
that ignores this reality is doomed to fail.

Coaching is not...
telling people what to try and
do and how to do it, that is a lot of like teaching or instructing. That's not to say that
there is never an area for 'telling' in a very work state of affairs, it's simply that we have a
tendency to shouldn't decision it coaching. It could well be that if someone is new to the team or simply
typically inexperienced that our management style desires to involve additional telling at the start. But once the individuals that we
tend to work with have a decent level of knowledge and ability, telling becomes counter productive because those self same
individuals will instinctively wish to use their information and skills as best they will and request to exercise a very
little initiative and independence. If we have a tendency to persevere telling, we tend to stifle those instincts and end
up with a frustrated team of 'yes men'. We tend to will use coaching to help folks develop their information
and skills in their own unique means and encourage them to develop more still.

Coaching isn't about providing
uninvited feedback. Several of the organizations I work with claim to have a longtime coaching set up but are mystified
by its patchy results. Nearer examination reveals that what goes on within the name of coaching in anything but. Staff
are observed in action and then a manager or a thus called coach - sometimes clutching a clipboard - takes
them off to a private area and runs through an inventory of mistakes created or opportunities missed. This kind of
clumsy feedback does a lot of damage than smart and at worst will stoke up resentment and a want to
hunt revenge or 'get management back'. An educator, on the opposite hand, would be offering any feedback free from judgement
and inserting much more importance of what the employees member had noticed throughout the interaction in question.

As a
coach you're not obliged to rescue folks and have all the answers. goal setting This is often an straightforward
lure to fall into for the inexperienced coach and creates a heap of pressure. It might preferably be that despite
a lengthy coaching conversation or a series of them, a downside remains unsolved or a coachee is no any forward.
This would like not mean that the coaching has 'failed' or perhaps that the coach has done something wrong. I
stress once more: coaching is not a magic panacea to cure all work place ills. Some work problems are advanced,
multi-half and not simply solved. Some people that you simply coach may have given up in spirit if not in
body and place themselves beyond the reach of even the best coach. You'll be able to rest assured that a
bit of good coaching cannot do any harm and will sometimes do a minimum of some good.

Coaching
is most actually not only for poor performers, and to position it as such could be a mistake. A certain
approach to kill off coaching in its infancy in an organization is to introduce it alongside a performance management system
or disciplinary process. Alternatively, to introduce coaching by encouraging the already top performers to develop even further, sends a lot
of additional positive signals and positions coaching as about moving forward; regardless of from where you start.

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When I talk about the comfort zone, I am talking about a space within oneself where one can liveand move securely and safely, in the sense that it is comfortable and familiar. From this, it can be seen
that it is a rigid space which has defined boundaries and a fixed threshold level. In this way, it is
like a closed box, which by its very nature makes a clear delineation between what exists inside the box and
what exists outside the box. For the purposes of this metaphor, that which exists inside the box represents the body
of experience that life has exposed you to, and that which exists outside the box is anything and everything that
falls out of this sphere. In other words, it is the experience of life that you do not know because
it is not what you have touched or made conscious contact with.

When one functions within the boundaries of
the comfort zone, they obtain the benefit of feeling the sense of security, calmness and reassurance that comes with living
a life in which they continue to do things the way in which they have always done them. I am
sure that you have met people who live lives that are characterized by conformity, routine and sameness. Maybe they have
been in the same position at the same workplace for years on end. Maybe they have lived in the same
house or different houses in the same suburb or location. Maybe they frequent the same places, eat the same food
or socialize only with people who are very similar to them. Maybe that person is you

What is clear
is that these people are entrenched in the comfort zone, in that they have allowed their love of routine and
sameness to become their limitation. Why they are limited is because they are blocking off the abundance of gifts and
the potential for growth that new experience brings.

Imagine how comfortable it would be to live your lifein a cardboard box. Imagine having to hold, bend and scrunch your head and limbs into position so that you
could fit into that confined space. What you would quickly realize as you visualize this scenario is that what we
often label as comfortable is in truth not comfortable at all. So often, we cling to what is comfortable as
a form of security, but we never really find what we are looking for. This is because we have ultimately
sought security where it cannot be found. comfortzone If you were to look at an inmate in a penitentiary,
you would say that they are secure locked in their cell, but are they ever really comfortable. To this question,
I would have to answer in the negative.

And how often does it feel like we are prisoners unto
ourselves. We do this or that because we know that it will achieve a certain aim, but is that aim
what we really want Unfortunately, what I have come to observe in my life and the lives of others is
that we suffer terribly from carrying the weight that is the proverbial ball and chain suppressing our growth.

Each
and every one of us should make it a consistent habit to seek out and engage in activities and experiences
which have the effect of pushing back the walls of our comfort zone. Only by doing this will we stretch
beyond our limitations and move to a realm of being that is aligned with the peace and joy to be
found in spirit.

Stretching can be one of the most powerful abilities that you can develop in your life
because it shows you in a very powerful way that you can do and accomplish what at one time you
perceived to be impossible or beyond your limitations. While stretching beyond the limits of your mind may prove challenging and
uncomfortable when you first begin to practice it, know within that the seed of learning is contained in the experience
which will inevitably lead you to grow in the areas of life where it matters most.

Think about the
concept of the comfort zone and the way in which it corresponds to weight training, as this metaphor illustrates well
how the principle operates. Just say that you go to a gym and that when you engage in a resistance
training session to work your arms, you consistently put 25 kilograms on the bar. Over time, as you repeat lifting
this weight load, this becomes your threshold, being the limit with which you can lift the weight effectively and efficiently.
In other words, the 25 kilograms represents the boundary of your comfort zone. This means that if you keep on
lifting this 25 kilogram weight, you will maintain whatever strength you already have, and that should you start to lift
a weight which is below the 25 kilogram mark, your arm muscles will atrophy to the extent that you have
decreased the weight level.

But just say that your weight training program dictates that you are to work towards
lifting 50 kilograms on the bar, being the ultimate goal which you have set for yourself. This would mean that
at some stage, you would have to begin to lift 26 or 27 kilograms to increase your muscles tolerance to
the weight. Translated another way, you would have to move out of your comfort zone to reach the goal that
you have set for yourself. While continuing to lift the 25 kilograms is a comfortable option because it is all
you have ever known and experienced, you will never stretch yourself and move towards your goal unless you go beyond
it. Only once you travel down the path of growth and transcend your limits, will you discover yourself and realize
the goal which is freedom in spirit.

In making the decision to move from Perth to London, I made
the decision to move out of my comfort zone. Wanting to travel and experience how life is lived differently in
other parts of the world, I packed my bags knowing that I was about to step into the unknown, and
while I struggled with this initially and suffered the pangs of uncertainty that inevitably come when you are about to
enter a new world, I never questioned the correctness of my decision because I knew that from a growth perspective,
it was exactly what I needed.

All that I can say is that sometimes the point just comes when
you find it too hard to tolerate and accept what you previously went along with without question. When this happens,
you will have passed over the tipping point that will lead you to act in new ways. Having lived in
my mother's house for so long, I saw it as necessary to leave, not because I didn't love my mother
or want to spend time with her, but because my call to growth was making me restless and uncomfortable in
a place which was no longer spacious enough to cater for my needs and burgeoning ambition.

Wanting my own
space in which I could become self-reliant, I knew that the time had come to pass over into another dimension
within myself. This of course would require me to take a giant leap, which was something that I didn't necessarily
feel comfortable making at home. What often happens is that when you live in a place so long, you begin
to conform to the expectations of others who share that same space. Living with them day to day, they come
to accept you because your personality has become predictable to them. With this, comes an unconscious agreement between you and
your neighbours that as long as you don't change, you will continue to remain acceptable in their eyes.

Here,
I would say be cautious in the bargains that you make. While we like to think that having a predictable
personality is virtuous, it can be divisive to our integrity of being when it leads us to think and behave
in ways that are not aligned with the greatest part of who we are. With this, understand that personality is
not the same as character. While the latter characterises your inner world which is foundational to your being, the former
is only a surface identity that we present to the world.

Given that this is the case, we should
enjoy living a life in spirit unburdened by the pressure to conform to the expectations of others, especially when those
expectations are imposed just to keep you in a space that others occupy. In 'The Teachings of Don Juan' by
Carlos Castaneda, the shaman Don Juan teaches Castaneda that he is not truly free because he thinks and behaves in
predictable ways. Conditioned by the world to conform to its expectations, Don Juan points out to Castaneda that he has
allowed himself to become a puppet in life's great play, with others really pulling the strings to his life.
/>Restrained in spirit, we inevitably suffer when our personality is contorted, so as not to match the fabric of our
character. Divided in two, we become scarecrows in the world, knowing only a bland existence that is characterised by conservatism.
Wanting to express so much more, we suppress so much more, until the person who we are on the outside
is a stranger to the spirit in the heart.

Ultimately, we should be free to express fully who we
are in any given situation, even if this means deviating from what others in our vicinity judge to be acceptable
behaviour. In saying this, I am not advocating that you act in rude and disrespectful ways towards others, because this
would serve neither them nor you. What I am saying though is that we should be free to be responsible,
and this necessarily entails living an integrated life, when what is open to us is the choice to live a
fragmented one.

Given the choice, each of us would choose integrity for ourselves, but most of us have not
the strength to make that choice because we are prisoners to our comfort zones. Weakened by what we have grown
to accept, we have not grown at all, for how we have moved is backwards on the spiritual path. Wanting
not to be responsible, we have chosen to be controlled by the ego which would have us conform rather than
be free.

Free, each of us can realize our potentiality in spirit, so have growth be the choice that
you make for yourself. To know yourself as not only a child of God, but as an extension of him,
is never comfortable because it forces you to look at yourself and all of the illusory barriers that you have
constructed, which separate you from the source of your greatness. Never are any of us a complete work, and while
we are complete in the Godliness that we possess, we are incomplete in our spiritual understanding which impedes our progress
in shaping the physical world.

Not thriving in our comfort zones, we have created a world that is filled
with survivors, but he who survives, dies a tragic death, because the life which preceded it was filled with many
regrets. Sent to fulfil a divine purpose, meaning was compromised as the vision was lost. Gifted with everything, much was
wasted in the pursuit of pleasure and the fear of failure. Only wanting to find happiness where it existed, it
makes the stranger's death all the more tragic when you consider that it was his own mind that killed him
before his time. Deserving much more, he received so little, for the contribution that he made was not truly his,
but that of a sloth who was comfortable with sharing his name.

With growth as life, and life as
joy, one cannot know true fulfilment when they have allowed fear to condemn them to a life of mediocrity. What
is mediocre is that which is safe, for life is all about taking risks. By this I do not mean
putting yourself in unnecessary danger, for this does not serve the spirit. Rather, I mean that we should explore and
discover new horizons, not only in the physical world, but within ourselves.

To be safe is to be sorry,
for with safety comes many regrets. For most people who look back on their lives, it is not the things
that they did do which stings most painfully, but rather the things that they failed to do. Wanting to do
so much more, they succumbed to fear and settled too early and too cheaply for the crumbs of life, when
what was available to them was a feast fit for a king.

As I look out into the world,
I see that those who are living the most extraordinary lives are those who are about progress. Being about progress,
they are about growth, both for themselves and the world. Having this as their driving force, they do not let
complacency creep in to rob them of the opportunity to grow. Firm in the legacy that they intend to leave,
this is the vision that they allow to guide them in their everyday lives.

Having a vision, they see
a future in which it will be realized. But nothing is achieved if you allow only the future to come
to you. For progress to be made, one must be prepared, bringing with them to every moment the passion to
be found in spirit. But who is passionate and bored at the same time Not the one who is content
in shaping the world in God's image, for what burns in their heart is an eternal flame that will not
go out as long as the vision is kept.

Those who live in the comfort zone will invariably become
bored with life because it was not meant to be lived without challenge and new experience. This I know firsthand,
for as I have stood still, so have I suffered under the weight of a deep seated knowing that I
was not really living. Treading water, I had only my head above water, and was incapable of seeing the richness
of life in the moments that I was given to enjoy.

Wanting more, I had to demand more of
myself. Not knowing what the outcome would be, I did not care, for I know that with novel action comes
the gift of new insight. Standing in a different place, one is able to see the world in a new
way and learn more about who they are. Exposed to more, one invariably becomes more, and made more powerful is
the ability to manifest.

With this, understand that never can you manifest what you have not seen. Being what
is undiscovered within you, there is much that new experience can add to your being. Do not take this to
mean that you are incomplete, for in spiritual terms you are already whole, and will be so for eternity. But
this you do not recognize because you have yet to awaken. Sleeping for so long, you have bought into the
idea that integrity is but an idle wish, but your most animated dreams capture the deepest truth that new experience
is holistic in its teachings.

How new experience adds to your being is by opening up the channels for
transformation within you, for with every new discovery a dormant part of your spirit comes alive to touch the world.
With life being a gift through its teachings, so are its gifts made all the more valuable when they are
honoured by the spirit. Existing on the same level, the wisdom of love is able to shine through when it
is God that is recognized as the presence of life.

Never is the process of learning over, for as
we learn, so do we remember what our apathy and boredom would have us forget. The greatest lessons are learned
in the light, not in the dark, for in darkness we are made to feel comfortable. Comfortable, we soon grow
sleepy, and as we close our eyes, so do we become blind, seeing only a life to be lived not
from the heart, but from the closed mind.

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Why do we shy away from facing reality Why do we mask the truth with a lie Come tothink of it, all of us as humans love to live in our own comfort zones. It is an in-born
desire. Life, in its basic form hardly offers much comfort, both physical as well as mental. We are compelled to
identify it ourselves and if we are unable to do that, we create them. After all, there is no better
alternative in life than to feel good.

So what is it that the first few weeks or monthsin a dating scenario that makes it so rollicking and tempestuous Mull over this: firstly you find someone, find whether
the chemistry is right, and if it is so, pursue it with positive energy. Now there is a lot of
art, but hardly any science in pursuing, as even Shakespeare commented: the love of pursuit. This involves interplay of a
few of the most basic human emotions and mental processes comfortzone. This is an area, where Dating Gurus would
like to believe that they know whats happening.

But if you are on the look out for a How-To
book in the market, there are hardly any, which talks about or addresses the issue of actually finding a date.
Most dwell on the management of a relationship, much after the couple has crossed the initial stages of difficult and
uncomfortable wooing. Memories of the struggle which both had gone through in the initial stages, make most couples stick together
even in later months.

One of the most important factors in the early days of romancing (consider thefirst 60 days) that carry the couple through is, what I call, the Novelty Syndrome. Much like when we got
a new toy in our childhood. The sheer excitement of getting to know someone, open up fresh vistas in your
mind and makes you go blind and start believing in a few white lies. You are hardly in a mood
to confront the warning signals as they gradually appear, but if you do, you can avoid the numerous pitfalls which
may lie ahead.

It is important to remember one important thing about human nature. Nothing new holds itsnewness after a while. A new car, a new house, a new bike eventually lose out on its new appeal.
Even in a relationship, why does it have to wither out What happened to that spark It happens mainly, because
you knew her almost fully and started to take her for granted. The secret behind any successful relationship that lasts,
has a lot to do with investment and re-investment of time, love, care and trust goal setting. The saying,
you reap what you sow, holds very true in a human relationship.

You will agree with me that the
first ten dates, are perhaps the trickiest, despite the initial euphoria of knowing someone new. This section can, to my
mind, be analyzed using science, rather than art. If you care to break this period step by step and focus
on each step, you are less likely to fall into the better than nothing trap. Obviously you will learn through
your numerous mistakes, but I am going to take you through a logical, scientific process, which aims to make you
learn faster so that you emerge with your sanity and prestige intact.

If you have seen Sex andthe City, has it ever occurred to you, what makes it so successful Undoubtedly, it is entertaining and perceptive, but
the truth of the matter is that it is so REAL comfortzonebook. It emphasizes, more than anything else, how
unstable and shaky the entire contemporary dating scene is! And, to top it, hardly understood! Thus, it is time to
remove all that shining veneer and bring you face to face with REALITY.